Would You Read It Wednesday # 56 – Melody Wants A Piano (PB) And A Short And Sweet Wrap-Up

I hope everyone had a terrific Labor Day weekend and that everyone who is a kid or has kids is off to a great start for the new school year!

The Summer Send-Off Contest was tons of fun.  If you haven’t had a chance to read the entries, check them out when you get a minute.  Everyone wrote such original, creative, amazing stories within the constraints of 250 words – which turned out to be REALLY hard (for me anyway!) – and I’m sure you won’t want to miss them.  As of this writing (not yet midnight) there are 15 contestants.  Finalists will be posted Monday September 10 for you to vote on for the winner.  For those of you who weren’t able to participate, don’t worry – The Halloweensie Contest is only 2 months away! 🙂  (In case you want to plan ahead, it will take place on October 31 – Halloween! 🙂

In other news, I still haven’t finished cleaning my office, so there will be no photos and no wrap-up on that… yet!!! 🙂

Before we get to today’s pitch, I just wanted to do a quick wrap-up of Summer Short & Sweets.  By my reckoning, 16 people contributed an entry to all 8 weeks.  A couple even went above and beyond and added additional entries to a couple of weeks – what motivation and dedication!  So, for the Sweet 16 (how well did that work out?!) the promised prizes will be delivered… but I’ll be needing snail mail addresses.  Here is a peek at the prize:

A Short & Sweet Notebook/Journal, Note Pad, and Pen,
and a small pack of Susanna’s Fabulously Fun Story Sparker Cards!

And here are the Sweet 16:

Delores           Tracy C.
Jennifer R.       Cathy
Vivian              Romelle
Erik                 Heather
Renee              Karen L.
Penny              Jarm
Kim Murray       Robyn
Pam                 Laura R.

Please use the handy Email Me button on the right or email me at susanna [at] susannhill [dot] com with your address.  If you think your name should have been on this list and you deserve a prize, please let me know.  It is entirely possible that I made a mistake somewhere in the craziness that was this summer and I will be happy to go back and recheck! 🙂

Now then, onto today’s pitch!  (Don’t forget to rustle up your Something Chocolate – and feel free to share what you’re snacking on in the comments :))  Which reminds me, apropos of nothing, that I’m thinking of changing the way I label Would You Read It days.  I’m thinking about switching to Would You Read It Wednesday #56 – Title (genre)… as I did on today’s post.  Any thoughts about that?  I think it would be more interesting and informative… 🙂  And I may have some free time in 2027 when I could go back and relabel all the old posts 🙂

Anyway, today’s pitch comes to us from Tina, who has pitched for us once before (see The 42nd Pitch)
Tina is an author of 21 guided reading books from Lakeshore Learning and Compass Media, 2 contracted nonfiction books for girls with Legacy Kids Press, and even has a coloring book coming out in 2013 with Warner Press. She is a former elementary teacher who currently homeschools her 5th grade daughter and 2nd grade son. Though she grew up in Iowa, she is now living outside of Seoul, South Korea. She is participating in Julie Hedlund’s 12×12 in 2012 picture book challenge.

And here is her pitch:

Working Title:  Melody Wants A Piano
Age/Genre:  Picture Book
The Pitch:  Melody has a song in her heart until she discovers her best friend has a piano of her own. When the neighbor’s piano is put up for sale, Melody wants to buy it, but her family can’t afford it. She is determined to raise money using her somewhat wonderful singing skills, even participating in a talent show.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Tina improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in October, which is not very far away!

Tina is looking forward to your thoughts!  (And just know that she lives on the other side of the world and is asleep while some of us are awake, so if she doesn’t respond right away that’s why! :))  I am going to finish cleaning my office.  I really am.  Right after I brush the dogs and take them for a walk, and maybe bake some cranberry bread because fall is in the air… 🙂

Have a great day everyone!

61 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday # 56 – Melody Wants A Piano (PB) And A Short And Sweet Wrap-Up

  1. Heather Newman says:

    Sweet prizes for the summer writing exercises, Susanna!

    Tina, I don't necessarily have a problem with Melody's jealousy of her friend's piano stealing her joy in music. Kids (and adults) can covet what others have and if it isn't a heavy handed theme it could open up some lovely discussions with a parent and child or in a classroom. It's also full of possibilities for an illustrator! The last sentence falls a bit flat. Perhaps you could have a different example of how she attempts to raise money or make it clear why participating in the talent show is an exceptional event for Melody? Her “somewhat wonderful singing skills” is a great humorous image, very strong. I would read it and good luck with your story!

  2. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Cool! Thanks, Tracy! That is all very interesting and helpful info!

    Tracy Campbell (unregistered) wrote, in response to Susanna Leonard Hill:

    Susanna, do you really want my long-winded answer to your question? Of course you do. 🙂
    Janice Hardy's post http://blog.janicehardy.com/2011/10/heres-pitchits-hit-crafting- your-novels.html says that a pitch is spoken and a hook is written.
    Randy Ingermanson and Peter Economy–Writing Fiction for Dummies” wrote the following: “Shoot for 25 words or less. If you can do it in less than 15 words, you get extra credit.”
    Here are two examples from his book.

    The Lord of the Rings, by J.R.R. Tolkien (fantasy): “A hobbit learns that destroying his magic ring is the key to saving Middle Earth from the Dark Lord.” (19 words)
    Another–My Name is Asher Lee, by Chaim Potok (literary): “An orthodox Jewish artist struggles to reconcile his art, his religion, and his family.” (14 words)
    I can't resist.
    Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen (romance): “A young English woman from a peculiar family is pursued by an arrogant and wealthy young man.” (17 words)
    Ah, that's where I came up with 17 words. 🙂

    Also check out: http://girlswithpens.com/2011/07/21/crafting-a-25-word-pitch/

    Hope that information helps.

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  3. Julie Rowan-Zoch says:

    Same opinion on the last line here. But I would pick it up because I am sucker for creativity, as in the MCs name! I've got my chocolate though: fresh hand made 'macarons' were B2G1free at the local French bakery, but I am waiting for family members to share after dinner – coconut, salted-caramel, and dark chocolate!

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