Would You Read It Wednesday #67 – Surprises Await (PB)

Wait until you hear this!  I have reached new heights of fame!

Why, you ask?

Because today I am a guest at By Word Of Beth, the wonderful blog of the lovely Beth Stilborn.  I am so honored that she invited me, so I hope you all might find a minute or two to go and visit her!  (Just, if you go now, don’t forget to come back here and help Katie with her pitch – remember, we have chocolate over here :))

I don’t know about y’all, but after a festive Thanksgiving week, I find myself quite behind in my work!… and it only promises to get worse as Christmas approaches!  So I have decided not to fight it.  I’m going to go with the flow and do the best I can and not worry.  (Well, okay, if we’re being honest, that’s pretty much impossible – who do I think I’m kidding? 🙂 – but I’m hoping if I write it down maybe I’ll convince myself :))

How’s everyone else doing?  Are you all abreast of your work or are you like me – always playing catch up? 🙂

Just thinking about everything on my to-do list today is making me feel a little peaked.  I think it’s time for Something Chocolate!  May I offer you some chocolate turtle cookies?

photo copyright Stacy Jensen 2012 used by permission

And shall we have a look at our pitch?

Today’s pitch comes to us from Katie.  Katie writes picture books and MG novels, is a puppeteer! (how cool is that?!), and is a stay-at-home mom to her 2 yr. old daughter and 5 yr. old son.  She can be found at her Website, or at A Life Spent Reading, the blog she writes with her critique partner.

Here is her pitch:

Working Title: Surprises Await
Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 3-7)
The Pitch: The trip to Grandma’s house takes forever. Time drags on, and there isn’t enough to do, until a seven-year-old boy discovers an amazing sight. Beautiful hot air balloons fill the sky. Suddenly, this trip may not be so boring after all.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Katie improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in January, so you have time to polish 🙂 for a chance for it to be read by editor Erin Molta!

Katie is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!  And I am looking forward to checking at least a few things off my to-do list!

Have a great day, everyone, and if you didn’t click over to Beth’s yet, take a cookie for the road and head on over 🙂

62 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday #67 – Surprises Await (PB)

  1. Katie Cullinan says:

    Thanks for the comments, Theresa! There is definitely more excitement in the story itself than in the pitch. Something to work on!

  2. Tina Cho says:

    I'm with you, Susanna, regarding work. I've been swamped this week with writing assignments. But there's a light at the end of the tunnel!

    Katie, a hot air balloon book sounds marvelous. In Iowa, where I'm from, they had a hot air balloon festival. Beautiful sight! So maybe you could capture the uniqueness and brightness and wow factor more in your pitch.

  3. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Thanks for the chocolate, Susanna…and especially for starting this blog and following through and thinking of PPBF, Would You Read It Wednesday, Oh Susanna, Short and Sweets, writing contests…yes, you are amazing!!! I read your guest post/interview on Beth's blog…awesome!

    Katie…great story idea. 🙂 I would definitely pick up the book…and I agree with Carrie, Joanna and the others who gave excellent suggestions on tightening up the pitch and adding some excitement.

  4. Kirsten Larson says:

    This is an intriguing pitch. I can just hear a child saying the trip is taking FOREVER. I have a couple of thoughts that might add to it, first, why don't you use your character's name instead of a description of him, so we can connect with the character? Also, I would avoid words like “beautiful” and “amazing.” They don't tell us much about what's going on. Do the balloons remind him of something? Why is it such an amazing sight? Good luck, and I hope this helps!

  5. Lauri Meyers says:

    The hot air balloons are intriguing. I'm wondering if the pitch can hint at how the book illustration would work – it could be problematic if the whole book is in the car. But maybe he's passing cows and trucks and the illustrations are more about the view from the windows?

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