Would You Read It Wednesday #161 – Son Of Boogie (PB)

In case you are wondering (now that it’s February 11) I have NOT forgotten about picking winners for Phyllis’s Birthday Bonanza!

I’ve just been highly distracted from work by people in this house having snow days – which is absolutely lovely! – but allows me to watch back-to-back episodes of Say Yes To The Dress and/or the entire Star Wars saga out of the corner of my eye when I’m supposed to be focusing on whose Ode To Phyllis is the best.

Phyllis thinks everyone should win because she loved them all.

I also loved them all, but I said that if everyone won then no one would FEEL like they won.

Phyllis said that was horsehockey and didn’t even make sense and was I going to eat the last strawberry pancake or could she have it?

So you can see it was a very productive conversation.

The easy route would be to make YOU guys pick.  But I’m always making you vote for things, and I still don’t have an “I Voted” sticker to tempt you with, so I don’t know if that would be asking too much.  Do you guys want to vote?  Or do you want Phyllis me to pick?  Let me know in the comments along with your thoughts for today’s pitcher and then, weather depending :), we’ll try to get around to one or the other before Spring actually arrives 🙂

Oh!  And before we get to today’s pitch, we have a winner for the December/January Pitch Pick from last week!

Drum roll please….. rata-tat-tata-tat-rata-tat-tata-tat-etc….

The winner is MICHELE! with her pitch for Hoot & Holly!!!

Congratulations, Michele!  Your pitch has been sent to editor Erin Molta for her comments, and I’m sure you’ll hear from her soon.

And congratulations to all our other fine and brave pitchers!  You all did an excellent job – it was a tough choice! – and I hope you all feel good about bravely putting yourselves out there to test your pitches and that you found the feedback from our wonderful and generous readers helpful and constructive!

Now, then, onto today’s Would You Read It!

I love that today’s pitcher volunteered her own Something Chocolate… and boy does it look good!  Can I offer you a cup of coffee or a glass of milk to go with that?

Kusina Master Recipe’s Peanut Butter Fudge Cake
Recipe HERE (feel free not to watch the shocking presentation
on how to remove dark spots from your hands :))

I also REALLY love that today’s pitcher is using Would You Read It in a way I hoped people would (at least some of the time) but which seldom happens.  She’s using her pitch, and your feedback, to help her figure out her story! (as you’ll read below.)

So without further ado, today’s pitch comes to us from Kathy.  Kathy Halsey has been writing picture books and nonfiction stories for two years. In a prior life she taught English and served as a K-12 school librarian. Since she has an agent, Jodell Sadler at Sadler Children’s Literary, the purpose of her pitch is to guide her plot and focus her manuscript.

Here is her pitch:

Working Title: Son Of Boogie
Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 4-8)
The Pitch: Conquering the boards–skateboards, surf boards snowboards­–that’s Lil Boogie’s dream. He and his Pops head off the Half Pipe Park to skate, but his flips flop. Lil Boogie heads for the beach, but the waves bury him. And on the snowboard, an ice storm stops him cold. Back at the ski lodge, he finds his board–the CHESS BOARD. Lil Boogie rules and rocks this board like a king. SON OF BOOGIE is a 453 word picture book for PreK-2nd grade that champions perseverance and the father-son bond.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Kathy improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in July so you’ve got a little time to polish up your pitches and send yours for your chance to be read by editor Erin Molta!

Kathy is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!  I am looking forward to writing a new story. I don’t know when it will happen – I haven’t had an idea I feel really excited about in a while – but it could be today!  Why not?! 🙂

Have a wonderful Wednesday, everyone! 🙂

88 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday #161 – Son Of Boogie (PB)”

  5. Susanna Leonard Hill says:
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    Happy Birthday, dear Vivian! By all means – have the whole cake – I can make more very easily 🙂 I'm sorry about your car adventure yesterday – I read about it on FB or somewhere – I'm glad everything turned out all right. And who knows – maybe the ms you stayed in to write will be the first one that sells 🙂 Thanks so much for your helpful comments for Kathy and your nice rewording of the pitch!

  15. Susanna Leonard Hill says:
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    I'm so glad I amuse someone besides myself, Teresa 🙂 And I wish we could have had a whole day too – it would have been fun! But we'll get that when I come to the retreat you're having at your house 🙂 Phyllis and the dogs and I will come up with some kind of plan… probably the blind leading the blind 🙂 Thanks so much for your helpful and insightful comments for Kathy!

  17. Pamela Courtney says:
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    Not sure if anyone else feels this way, but I would love to have a chance to vote on the Ode. There were some really great entries. And that chocolate and peanut butter treat, Yummmy! As for Kathy's story, I certainly would read it. I have read it and I am in love with Lil Boogie. I love the explanation at the end of your pitch, too. Well done. I don't have much to add to the advice you've already received, Kathy. Your pitch makes me wanna read all about Lil Boogie. Let me know when an offer for the book comes in, will ya?

  18. Tina Cho says:
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    Kathy, I love your premise. My son would love this story, as he likes skateboards and chess. I like the language in the 1st sentence that says his flips flop. Can you have something that cool for the next 2 sentences that describe the waves and the ice storm?

  19. JulieSwitzerland says:
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    Well done, Kathy! I think the idea of this book is touching, and I am sure personal to many..as a Mum of two sons who idolized their Dad and everything he did, I would read it!
    So Susanna….why did you cross out Phyliss' name for voting….have you two fallen out AGAIN..? 😉

  20. Rebekah Hoeft says:
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    1. I think Phyllis should get to decide on her favorite, unless she has wisely decided to go back to sleep. In which case, Susanna, I am sure she won't mind if you do the honors.

    2. Congratulations, Michele! I hope I get to pull this off the bookstore shelf soon!

    3. Darn it. Want that cake to go with my coffee this morning. And my lunch and dinner later.

    4. Would read this book, Kathy. Love books that show dads in a positive light.

  26. Suzy says:
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    I say Phyllis should make the BIG decision, Susanna for all of the Birthday Bonanza entries. After all, it is HER party!

    Hip, hip, hooray for Michele, the winner of her pitch for Hoot & Holly!

    Peanut Butter Fudge Cake! Yum! I look forward to baking some.

    I would read your book, Kathy. The opening line piques my curiosity and I want to know more about Little Boogie's dream. Perhaps the second should include the word TO . . . head off TO Half Pike Park, where is flips become flops.

  27. Wendy Rider Engelmann says:
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    Wow, Kathy – what a response e you have received on your pitch. I too would love to read the book. I really liked Julis Rown-Zoch's suggested rewrite of your well done pitch. Chess versus checkers seems to be an issue for some. What will you decide? The father -son relationship could send a strong message to boys AND fathers. Well done.

  28. Kathy Halsey says:
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    Wendy, I am shocked an happy by the response. I am going to see if there's a way to maybe get both games in. O maybe that's an editor/agent question.