Howdy Friends!
How’s the first week of school going for everyone? Hopefully your school buses are showing up!
Things are busy in my neck of the woods, but I got a surprise visit from my sister, so that was amazing! (Too short, but I guess every visit is. We should live closer!)
Also, in my quest to discover that which is nonessential but endlessly entertaining, I found out that Violet’s DNA test claims she is a mix of 24 breeds including 9% Chihuahua, which is why even though she looks like this:
she still clearly thinks she’s a lap dog 😊
It’s all in how you see yourself, right? 😊 I’m pretty sure there are a whole lot of good picture book ideas in that!
I don’t know about you, but I see myself having a little Something Chocolate right about now. Chocolate Oreo Cheesecake Chocolate Cake anyone? Why yes, thank you, don’t mind if I do! 😊
Oreo Cheesecake Chocolate Cake
Now then, onto today’s pitch which comes to us from Hannah who says, “Hello, there! I’m Hannah, an army wife, mother to three boys, and children’s writer. I love writing for kids because it brings out the kid in me 😊”
Find her on the web at https://www.hannahlapehnbooks.com/
Here is her pitch:
Working Title: The Good Wolf
Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 4-8)
The Pitch: All Wolfington wants is to be included, but when he goes into town, grandmothers hide, pigs squeal, and sheep faint. Fed up with the big bad wolf stereotype, Wolfington sets out to prove that his heart is bigger than his stomach.
So what do you think? Would You Read It? YES, MAYBE or NO?
If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest. If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Hannah improve her pitch. Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome. (However I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful. I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks! For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on Would You Read it in the dropdown under For Writers in the bar above. There are openings in October, so you could get your pitch up pretty soon for helpful feedback and a chance to have it read and commented on by editor Erin Molta!
Hannah is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch! I am looking forward to reading the pile of picture books on my desk – some new, some just new to me – but all of them look good!
Have a wonderful Wednesday everyone!!! 😊
Susanna Leonard Hill 
Yes, I would read it. I love fractured fairy tales, especially those that bust stereotypes.
Thanks for the positive vote, Norah!
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I would definitely read it, it sounds really good fun, and I like the title.
Thanks for your enthusiasm, Angela!
I would definitely read this! Sounds like a fun adventure.
Thanks for your encouraging vote, Nancy!
Yes, I would definitely read it! This is such a perfect pitch with just enough information to draw me in and not giving too much away. I also like that you’re writing about the dangers of stereotypes and preconceived ideas which is a fabulous topic. Good luck.
Susanna, regarding the DNA testing, every dog is a lapdog!
Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply to Hannah, Laura! And hahaha, yes, you might be right! Although most of my other big dogs (and I’ve only ever had big dogs) have been content to sit/lie next to me – not ON me! 😊
Yes, I definitely would read this, Hannah. Like Laura said, this is a fabulous topic. And I love that last phrase, “his heart was bigger than his stomach.” Awww! You’ve got us rooting for Wolfington!
Our mostly coon hound grandpup thinks she’s a lapdog, too, Susanna. For some reason, the DNA test companies fail to include lapdog in the results.
Thanks for your enthusiasm for Hannah, Patricia! And yes, the DNA companies should include lapdog. I was pretty sure Violet was going to turn out to be Garbage Disposal, Vacuum, or Silly Baby 😊
Absolutely! Love alternative fairy tales and this one sounds like great fun!
Thanks for the thumbs up for Hannah, Robin!
Yep! I’d love this to have a bit more detail about how he shows heart (not stomach). And is there anyone else in the community noticing him other than the naysayers?
Thanks for the helpful ideas, Katie!
Yes, I’d read this! I love books where the “bad guys” are really good guys. This sounds delightful. I love the details about what happens when the MC goes into town. Best wishes with this story, Hannah!
Thanks for your positive thoughts for Hannah, Sarah!
Yes! Your pitch is perfect and I would love to read this. Also, your website is beautiful!
Thanks so much for chiming in for Hannah, Deborah!
I love it and the pitch is just enough to pique my interest. I adore the breaking down of stereotypes. Just wondering are there other wolves in the story? Is he the only Good Wolf? Yes, I agree with Deborah Foster, your website is very inviting. Good luck.
Thanks so much for your thought-provoking questions for Hannah!
YES! Great pitch!
Thanks for chiming in, Karen!
Love the idea of defying stereotypes! Great theme and sounds hugely fun! I would read it!
Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts, Marta!
I would definitely read this! Great job of referencing the original “wolf” stories and breaking that stereotype with your story pitch! Sounds really fun!
Thanks for the thumbs up for Hannah, Judy!
Yes, it sounds awesome! The main character and his problem are clearly stated! I think the title is ‘good’ but not ‘great’. An adult would understand the play on The Good Wife title but a child needs a little more to grab onto in order to pluck it off the shelf.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the title Patti!
I’d definitely read it! I’m still smiling at the visual in my head 🙂
Thanks for chiming in, Donna!
Yes, I would definitely read this story. I kept reading over your pitch and couldn’t come up with much to suggest for improvement. It’s concise, tells what it needs to tell, and invites the reader into the book to find out how he proved himself. The only thing I might suggest is that although it hints at humor with the reactions of the characters, you might think of adding something so there is no question that this is a funny book. Are there specific words or additional situations you could include? But really, it’s probably fine the way it is. Good luck with this one! I’d love to read it.
Thanks for your very helpful thoughts for Hannah, Rose!
I believe you’ve nailed it!
Thanks for your enthusiasm for Hannah!
I would read this for sure! I think the pitch says all it needs to say and it sounds like a really fun piece. Good luck with it!
Thanks for the thumbs up for Hannah, Genevieve!
I would definitely read this! It sounds super fun.
Thanks for you positive response for Hannah, Eileen!
This is an intriguing pitch. I’d definitely read your story. One bit of confusion for me: you say the wolf goes to town, where he finds pigs and sheep. What are they doing in town?! Maybe clarify a bit, if this is indeed the case?
Susanna, belatedly getting my vote in for the Halloweensie contest. Hope you’ll do it again. Always look forward to it 🙂
Thanks for pointing that out for Hannah, Marty! And your Halloweensie vote is noted 😊
Wow sounds like the Perfect Pitch!!! I would read it !!! It is concise and offers the perfect amount of information to encourage readers to select this book! 🙂
High praise! Thanks, Susan!
Yes, I would read it! Like all the different versions of the big “bad” wolf!
Thanks for chiming in and sharing specifics for Hannah, Kelly!