Would You Read It Wednesday #404 – There Was A Small Python Who Swallowed A Flea (PB)

Hi there, everyone!

I learned something new yesterday that I know you’re all going to wish you’d known sooner (please prepare yourselves):

It is illegal to stand within 90 meters of the Queen without socks on!

Am I the only one who didn’t know this?

I mean, how many times have I stood 89.5 meters from the Queen in bare feet? Or in my sandals with NO SOCKS?

It is a miracle I have never wound up in the royal dungeon!

As soon as I heard about this I knew I had to warn you. I hope I’m not too late to save you all from incarceration.

I’m really wondering, though, who exactly this is a problem for. Is the Palace overrun with barefoot people (or shod but sockless people) romping about in the presence of the Queen?

Do the guards at Buckingham Palace entertain themselves by daring each other not to wear socks and see if anyone notices? 😊

Maybe the Queen walks along their ranks each day and uses her walking stick to lift the hem of their pants and see if they’re wearing socks with their shoes of if those sneaky guys tried to break the law by putting their shoes onto bare feet!

But mostly I wonder who thought this was something that mattered enough to be a law? I can just imagine a bunch of gray-wigged heavy-jowled folks sitting around saying, “By George! We’ve just got to do something about all these sockless people cavorting willy-nilly in the Queen’s presence! It isn’t to be borne!”

And is this law all about respect for the Queen, or is this her way of making a public service announcement to encourage people to protect themselves against athlete’s foot?

These are the kinds of questions that occupy the minds of writers as we wonder, what if? The seeds of stories yet to come! I can see it now. A picture book called A Royal Case Of Athlete’s Foot 😊

Wow!

When one is wrestling with these kinds of weighty questions, it is absolutely necessary to have Something Chocolate on hand, don’t you agree?

Since we’ve been talking about feet, how about some Bear Paw Cookies for our Something Chocolate? They’re so cute! And they might send our writerly minds down a whole ‘nother path. . . what if a bear was in the presence of the Queen without socks on? In bare/bear feet?! 🤣

Bear Paw Cookies

When you’ve finished enjoying your delicious Bear Paw cookies and pondering sockless feet, we can get down to business – pitches!

Today’s pitch comes to us from Kizzi. Kizzi once ran away with the circus and worked with elephants and tigers. Now she writes as much as she can, finds lots of inspiration from her family, and goes on adventures a little closer to home.

Find her on the web at:
Her Blog: www.threeshowsaturday.com
Instagram: @Kizmonster

Here is her pitch:

Working Title: There Was A Small Python Who Swallowed A Flea

Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 4-8)

The Pitch: There was a small python who swallowed a flea because it was small, but pythons need MORE after all. So small python swallows more and more things and grows and grows. As he grows, so does his appetite, and soon he’s swallowing everything in sight. After small python has swallowed, slithered, and slurped, a huge buuuurrrrppppp might just solve all his problems.

So what do you think? Would you read it? YES, MAYBE, or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest. If you answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Kizzi improve her pitch. Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome. (However I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful. I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)

Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks! For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It, or on Would You Read It in the dropdown under For Writers in the menu bar above. There are openings in February, so you could get your pitch up pretty soon for helpful feedback and a chance to have it read and commented on by editor Erin Molta!

Kizzi is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch! I am looking forward to visiting the Queen! 😊

Have a wonderful Wednesday everyone!!! 😊

Would You Read It Wednesday #279 – A Little Witchy (PB)

Greetings, Friends!

I don’t know if any of you have noticed, but things are a bit topsy-turvy in Nature these days.

First (I am not making this up!  I heard it on the radio!) there is a warrant out for Punxsutawney Phil’s arrest because he said 6 more weeks of winter, which expired on March 16, and then we had a blizzard.

Second, we bounce around from 70 degrees to 10 below, sunshine to Nor’easters, like we’re inside a pinball machine.

And the blueberries in the pancakes?

Monday night I had a traumatic experience in which, just past midnight, I heard a frightening sound on my back porch.  My dogs began to growl, low in their throats, and all the fur stood up on their backs.  (And, just let me say, this is highly unusual for them because they need their beauty sleep and generally notice nothing between 9 PM and 5 AM!)

IMG_5096

 

I don’t mind telling you, my overactive imagination (you know, the one that makes me a writer? 🙂 ) went into overdrive and I was thinking up all kinds of terrifying scenarios in which I hoped my brave dogs would rise to my defense and protect me (even though I know they’re more likely to beg for treats from an intruder than pin him to the ground as their fierce ancestors would have done!  Or possibly just sleep through all the high jinx and shenanigans!)

So there I was, creeping around in the dark, the very definition of stealth, trying to catch a glimpse of whoever had made the noise, heart pounding, attempting to convince myself that I had probably only heard snow falling off the roof or something, my fierce protectresses bravely bringing up the rear, when suddenly Scout shot past me barking ferociously at the door!

Out in the shadowy moonlight I saw a dark shape stop moving at the noise!

And then, after a moment, slowly move forward again!

I was just about to think up a Clever Plan For Self Defense when the dark shape picked up speed… a distinctly lumbering type of speed…a familiar lumbering… and I realized . . . it was the bear!

The noise I’d heard was him wrecking and stealing my bird feeder!  Fiend!

IMG_5331

. . . the Scene of the Attack! 🙂 . . .

IMG_5332

But this highlights my point about weirdness in Nature.  I have lived on Blueberry Hill for 25 years and never seen the bears before the third week of April!

So, what, I ask, is going on around here?

Clearly we need Something Chocolate!

And what better in this instance than Bear Paw Cookies???!!!

Bear Paw Cookies

Mmmmmm!  Delish!  And perfect for the occasion 🙂

Now then, onto today’s pitch which comes to us from Jean who says, “I began life with aspirations of being a commercial artist, then changed to journalism before answering my true calling. After getting a scholarship to a Highlights Foundation Workshop Retreat, I’ve come full circle, as a beginning writing children’s lit writer learning the craft, work-shopping, pitching, submitting and trying to break in!”

Find her on the web at https://twitter.com/jrichson2013

Here is her pitch:

Working Title: A Little Witchy

Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 4-8)

The Pitch:  After her mother says Beatrice can be such a little witch at times, while she calls the baby an angel, Beatrice begins doing witchy things in order to make herself into a real witch. But the bad witches tire of her bumbling exploits and warn her to quit—once and for all! And the good witch tells her it would be better if she leave the witching to those who can, and that instead she try to be the best mortal girl she can be.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Jean improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)

Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on Would You Read it in the dropdown under For Writers in the bar above.  There are openings in April, so you could get your pitch up pretty soon for helpful feedback and a chance to have it read and commented on by editor Erin Molta!

Jean is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!  I am looking forward to getting a new bird feeder…and bringing it indoors at night! 🙂

Have a wonderful Wednesday everyone!!! 🙂