Would You Read It Wednesday – The 27th Pitch

Those of you who have been around the blog for a while know that I live in the wilderness.  You may have seen my posts on Mexican stand-offs with deer, and our run-ins with the bear #1 and #2.

So it will come as no surprise to you that I am being stalked by a masked marauder.  Apparently our unseasonably warm winter has confused it into thinking our garage is a raccoon hotel and he is entitled to stay as long as he likes and order room service.  Do I look like I’m offering room service?

google images

Now, I don’t know how much time you guys spend around raccoons, but they are not small.  They have sharp claws and pointy teeth, and they don’t dress like bandits for nothing!  On Disney they look really cute, but in real life they’re a little too much like the R.O.U.S.s in The Princess Bride.

So the raccoon and I are locked in epic battle over the fact that I want my car and he’s not leaving.

My current approach works like this:

Walk out front door of house singing “Love Shack” by the B-52s at the top of my lungs thinking that ought to scare the bejeesus out of anyone, human or raccoon!

It doesn’t.

But I have back-up: a flashlight, in case I need to stun him into submission with blinding light (assuming the batteries aren’t dead, which they probably might be because I haven’t checked them in, oh, a decade), and my daughter’s ice-hockey stick because it makes me feel brave.  (I have no intention of getting close enough to that wily critter to actually poke him or anything!!!)  I would love to have my trusty companions, Dog 1 and Dog 2, but I’m afraid it might hurt them – it shows no signs of compassion!

I dance forward, hockey stick out in front, in much the way a swordsman might approach an opponent (only I’m guessing I look a lot less elegant…)

The raccoon thumps around near the garbage can (which is empty, but he’s an optimist, apparently.)

“I’m coming in there!” I warn.

This fails to induce the element of fear I was hoping for.  I’m pretty sure he’s laughing at me.

The crafty little critter scuttles up into the rafters.  Now I KNOW he’s laughing at me. “I see you up there!” I call to the oversized rodent.  “You think you’re so clever, but your tail is hanging right down in plain sight!”  He doesn’t care apparently.  It’s way too much fun getting a rise out of me every time I need my car.

Fine!  I guess we don’t have to get groceries until tomorrow.  But this battle is not over!

Honestly!  The things I put up with on Blueberry Hill!

So, now that you’re laughing yourselves silly over my raccoon predicament, it’s about that time 🙂

Today’s Would You Read It contestant is Sharron, who loves reading, writing, sharing with friends, and learning new things.  Here is her pitch:

Working Title: Sorrysorrysorry
Age/Genre: Early PB (ages 2-5)
The Pitch:  Three frolicking baby giraffes try to find a place to play on a hot and crowded savannah. They find it isn’t an easy task. They run into a troop of baboons, a dazzle of zebras, and a pride of lions. At last, they turn to the river, only to be confronted by hippopotami. Our giraffes find fun and friendship at the end of a long a grueling day.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Sharron improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  Go ahead and send your pitch for a chance for it to be read by editor Erin Molta!
Sharron is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!
Just a little heads up – this month’s Author/Illustrator Interview will take place on Sunday February 19 (that’s this weekend folks) and our guest will be none other that Donna Farrell.  Donna is an illustrator, but what she will really be talking about is her work as a website and blog designer for authors and illustrators. Yes!  That means you!  She is absolutely terrific (she did my website and blog, need I say more? :))  So I hope you’ll all find a few minutes in your weekends to come see what she has to say!
Also, anyone who hasn’t had a chance to vote for a Valentines Contest winner yet, please go HERE.  We really need everyone’s votes – it’s a tight race! 🙂
Now.
Back to my battle with the raccoon! 🙂

55 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday – The 27th Pitch

  1. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Sharron…so sorry to hear you wound up in the hospital..hope everything resolves quickly and positively. I loved your story idea…I know that little ones would respond well to the gaggle of zebras and troop of baboons, etc. I also thought the title was great…but perhaps, as Rena suggested, exclamation points in between.
    Did I miss the first line…or wasn't it there…I think it would have pulled me in more if there had been one. But I definitely wanted to find out what happened to the 3 giraffes. 🙂

    Susanna…just a note about your resident raccoon…we lived in an old house in rural CT for 25 years…and called it Blueberry Hill because we had 100 blueberry bushes in the back! I also had a big vegetable garden with tomatoes, beans, peas…and CORN, which raccoons LOVE! One morning, I went to throw out the garbage (the cans were at the bottom of the driveway, under a big old maple tree) and saw that one of the cans had been knocked over. As I approached (cautiously) I realized the can was TREMBLING (and I started trembling too). I peered around and saw that a raccoon was in the knocked over can. As quick as I could, I up-ended the can and put the cover on it…ran in the house and called the local police who arrived soon after to take our scavenger away. 🙂

  2. Janet Johnson says:

    I probably would not read this one. This pitch does a lot of telling about events, but I'd love to catch a snippet of the voice of this story. And maybe I wouldn't tell the happy ending but use something to draw your reader in and make them have to read on to find out what happens. But it sounds like a fun book that teaches the group words for lots of different animals. Best of luck with it!

  3. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Oh, my! What a story! I actually love animals of all kinds, it's just that there was a rabid raccoon on our road earlier this week, so I was worried that it was that one – I didn't want that near the kids or the dogs! How funny that you also lived on a Blueberry Hill! We didn't name ours – it's been called that forever because the whole mountain is COVERED with blueberry bushes… probably why it's so popular with bears 🙂

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