Would You Read It Wednesday – The 49th Pitch!

Wow!  Do you know what I just realized?  This week’s pitch is #49, which means we’ve been doing Would You Read It for almost a whole entire year!  And week #52 – the WYRI Anniversary – is going to coincide with final week of the Olympics!  I have a feeling this calls for a celebration of some kind… I’m just not sure what 🙂  Feel free to make suggestions!  Especially if they involve chocolate cake 🙂 and open flame 🙂

All we need here is a little photoshopping so it says

I actually do have a special Would You Read It announcement today.  Remember that poll I took last week?  Well, some late voters changed the picture a bit.  The results indicated that the majority of you were happy either way, but a fairly large group were in favor of change, while only 3 people felt it should definitely stay the same.

So here’s what we’re going to try.  Beginning with July (you know, the month we’re in right now… last time I checked anyway… :)), any pitcher WHO WOULD LIKE TO (it is not in any way, shape, or form required!) may rewrite their pitch before the pitch pick based on the feedback they received from all you generous and helpful readers.  They will just have to get their rewrites in to me before the last day of the month.  Sound good?  I’m game to give it a try if you are.  If we all decide we hate it, we can always go back to the old system 🙂  But a lot of people have asked about it and would like the opportunity to improve, and I’m all for encouraging improvement 🙂

I would also like to take this opportunity to say how much fun I’m having with Summer Short & Sweets!  I’ve been amazed and gratified at how many people have been participating, and everyone is so creative and talented!  It’s such a pleasure to see what you all come up with that I find myself eagerly looking forward to Fridays!  Thank you all for being such great sports 🙂

But now, onward!  It’s time for today’s pitch which comes to us from the lovely Vivian whom I’m sure you all remember from last month’s incredibly informative guest post for the self-publishing mini-series, but just in case you don’t know her, here’s a little info:

Vivian Kirkfield has been involved in the care and education of young children for over 50 years.  From babysitting to teaching kindergarten and Head Start to raising her own three children while operating a home daycare, Vivian’s passion for picture books encouraged her to write her award-winning book, Show Me How! Build Your Child’s Self-Esteem Through Reading, Crafting and Cooking.  She shares her mission to help every young child become a lover of books and reading during her school visits with kindergarteners and her presentations to parent and teacher organizations.  Julie Hedlund’s 12 x 12 Challenge was the catalyst that started her writing picture book stories again…and now she can’t stop!  Many of her stories are based on her experiences as a teacher, mother and grandmother.  The Tomato Turner is a true story about her own family…and she plans several sequels…Confessions of the Tomato Turner and The Tomato Turner Returns.
Vivian’s book/author website:  http://www.positiveparentalparticipation.com

And now, here is her pitch:

Working Title:  The Tomato Turner
Age/Genre:  Picture Book (ages 3-8)
The Pitch:  Stuck in the middle between a brainy older brother and an adorable baby sister, four-year old Peter is determined to do something spectacular that will make everyone proud of him – when he sees the basket of green tomatoes on the kitchen counter, he seizes the opportunity to astonish his family.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Vivian improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in August, which is not very far away at all at this point, so we could really use some new pitches!!
Vivian is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!

And before we all go off to our wonderful Wednesdays, I wanted to mention a special upcoming treat!  My friend and fellow author, Tiffany Haber, had her debut picture book release yesterday!!!  Here is her book:

Awesome, no?!  And here’s where the special treat part comes in: Tiffany is coming over to visit with us here on Monday July 23 – that’s in like 5 days! – and along with what I’m sure will be a fabulously entertaining post, she will be giving away a signed copy of this exceptionally fun-looking brand new book!!!  Mine is on order and due to arrive tomorrow.  I can’t wait to read it!

Alrighty.  You’re excused.  Have a lovely day 🙂  Hope to see you Friday for Short & Sweets!

76 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday – The 49th Pitch!

  1. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Yay!!!! So glad I've intrigued you, Coleen…I'm really tickled pink after reading all of these comments…it is quite humbling. 🙂 It's great to think well of what you have written…but when others say so…that makes it real!

  2. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hi Cathy,
    Yes, this is such a wonderful learning experience for us all…I am so grateful to Susanna for providing this
    opportunity. Thank you so much for your suggestion…I'm definitely going to make a few changes before the end of the month. 🙂

  3. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    I know, Leigh…I LOVE a question in the pitch…but I am stuck on the advice I read somewhere that one should NEVER put a question in the pitch…but I see so many people who do…and I think it heightens the interest of the pitch. Thank you so much for your insights. 🙂

  4. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hannah, Hannah…love the Peter, Peter middle-seater…you are SO CREATIVE! Thank you for your input…I really appreciate your time and effort…”it's hard not to feel like the family's greenest tomato”…priceless. 🙂

  5. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    What amazes me always is how generous so many people are in this kid lit community…thank you for taking the time to help make the pitch better. 🙂 So glad you liked the story idea…each time I read the story, I fall in love with it more. 🙂

  6. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    I wholeheartedly agree, Penny! 🙂 She is amazing 🙂

    Penny Klostermann (unregistered) wrote, in response to Susanna Leonard Hill:

    There is NO telling what the amazing Renee came up with!!! She's full of surprises and creativity! She should have an exclamation point above her head…in fact she should have an over abundance of exclamation points above her head 🙂

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  7. Tiltonph says:

    Great pitch Vivian. Definitely would read your story. Creative and fun. You told just enough!

    Congratulations Tiffany.

  8. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Thanks for the input, Rosalind! That's what this is all about…so I do appreciate your thoughts…personally, I love picture books BECAUSE the age range is so wide…the youngest ones enjoy hearing it and looking at the pictures…the older ones relish being able to read it themselves (or to the younger ones). But I know there are many schools of thought on that.
    When we try to help one another be the best they can be, we are doing a great service…so I am grateful for your comments. 🙂

  9. Anna_church says:

    Yes, I would read it to my grandchildren. I am intrigued at the last of the pitch. What will he do with the tomatoes??

  10. Patricia Nozell says:

    Yes, I would read the book as pitched. I would, though, like to see a hint about turning in the pitch, perhaps by ending with “turning the tomatoes…” instead of “astonish his family”. I'm also very curious as to what Peter does to the tomatoes that will enable the Tomato Turner to become a series.

    The Monster who lost his Mean looks wonderful, Susanna. Looking forward to reading about it on Monday.

  11. Patricia Nozell says:

    ok, so the image is supposed to be an avatar, which seems to appear like magic when I post to other blogs. Hints? Many thanks!

  12. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Alas, I have NO idea! Some people's avatars seem to show up, but a lot of people are blank. I'm not sure if that's because they don't have avatars or because something is wrong… but I don't know how to fix it…

  13. Carrie F says:

    Yes, I would read it. I like books that have realistic plot lines for very young kids, and it sounds like this one does.

    I thought the title could maybe have a little more kid-appeal. Maybe “The Tomato Magician” or the “Kitchen Magician” or something like that?

    I think the pitch could be a bit shorter. For example — does it really matter that the tomatoes are on the counter? Details like that could be taken out.

    Stuck in the middle between a brainy older brother and an adorable baby sister, four-year old Peter IS SEARCHING FOR A WAY TO BE spectacular. A basket of green tomatoes GIVES HIM THE PERFECT CHANCE TO astonish his family.

    I also liked Hannah's rewrite. I think making the language a bit snappier would make the pitch stand out a bit more.

  14. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Thanks for chiming in, Tracy 🙂

    Tracy Campbell wrote, in response to Vivian Kirkfield:

    I'd read the book. I'm intrigued.
    And Hannah's advice was great.

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  15. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hi Carrie F…don't know why I missed replying to several comments here…so sorry! Thank you so much for your input…I love your suggestions…and may incorporate some of them in my rewrite. 🙂

  16. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hi Patricia…your comment seems to have been missed by me. 😦 I do thank you for your feedback…and agree that I may have to add a little something about the tomatoes at the end…quite a few people concurred. 🙂 Peter learned many life lessons in the tomato patch and I learned many lesson about parenting from Peter. 🙂 Those will be the meat of future Tomato Turner books. 🙂

  17. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hi Anna…it seems I missed responding to the last few comments here…I am so sorry…better late than never, I hope. 🙂 I'm so very happy you would read it to your grandchildren…I can't wait to read it to mine. 🙂

  18. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Hi Tracy…I am finally getting to respond to the last few comments…which I didn't realize were there until luckily I checked this evening! Thank you so much your encouragement…I agree that Hannah had some stellar ideas. 🙂

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