Happy Would You Read It Wednesday, Everyone!
I’m up to my ears this week, so just you watch how succinct I am today. It will be a lesson in brevity! (I can hear you! Stop that snickering. I can be brief – I’ll prove it! :))
Since this weekend is Easter, our Something Chocolate today shall be Rabbit Hole Cupcakes! 🙂
 |
| photo credit Stacy S. Jensen used by permission |
Yum!
Now… (brevity in action…)
Today’s pitch comes to us from none other than This Kid Erik! Eleven-year-old Erik plans to eventually take over the world. Right now he’s a bit too young, so he is spending time as a fifth grade student, book review blogger and hopeful writer. Erik blogs at This Kid Reviews Books.
Working Title: The Adventures Of Tomato And Pea
Age/Genre: Chapter Book (ages 7 and up) – intended as the first of a series.
The Pitch: For years the evil villain Wintergreen has tried to destroy super crime-stopper, Tomato, and his sidekick, Pea, and take over planet Oarg. In a plan gone wrong, Wintergreen and his gang tangle with Tomato and his friends in a runaway rocket ship that crashes on a strange planet called EAR-TH. Follow this brawling bunch of aliens as they try to get along, survive all the dangers on the strange planet, and find a way to get back to Oarg.
So what do you think? Would You Read It? YES, MAYBE or NO?
Erik is looking forward to your thoughts on his pitch! I am looking forward to jelly beans… and chocolate 🙂
Have a great day, everyone! 🙂
Susanna Leonard Hill 
Thanks for chiming in with your very helpful opinion too, Pat! 🙂
Thanks for your very helpful suggestions for Erik, Teresa! And I agree – he is amazing! 🙂
Who knows? It might even convince young readers to eat their veggies 🙂 Thanks for your 2 cents, Sue 🙂
Thank you for your wonderful suggestions for Erik, Wendy. I'm sure he will find them helpful. As for the cupcakes, blame Stacy. She made them 🙂
Thanks for your enthusiasm, Pam. I'm sure Erik will appreciate it! 🙂
Thanks for your comments for Erik, Penny. And I know! Isn't Stacy amazing?
Forget the peas! Go for the cupcakes! 🙂
Thanks for your comments for Erik, India! 🙂
I know it – I like that bad guy angle too 🙂 Thanks for coming over, Michelle!
Veggie-tastic is officially my favorite word of the day! 🙂 Thanks Angela 🙂
Thanks Ms. Campbell!
Thanks Ms. Mack! 😀
Thanks! 😀
Yes I would certainly read this. I can just imagine the cover of this story, very bright and eye catching. Loved the tightening advice Wendy and the others have given. Great job Erik, Whoahoo!
Thanks for chiming in, Diane! So nice to hear your lovely voice back here again after your vacation 🙂
Erik's story sounds great. I read the pitch to my 7 year old daughter and she said “I'd like to read that story. Can you get it for me please Mum.” I liked how he used runaway rocket ship and brawling bunch of aliens. The story sounds adventurous and the pitch entices you to read more.
I don't know how I missed this – WAIT – I was sick on Wednesday! I like Wendy G.'s suggestion to tighten the first two lines. But I'd suggest tightening a little more “tangles with super crime-stopping duo, Tomato and Pea,…”Good luck, Erik!
Stacy's cupcakes inspired my angel food rabbit hole cake for Easter!
I would read this, or perhaps if I had a son, my son would read it. 🙂
This last sentence could be tightened: “… try to get along, survive all the dangers on the strange planet, and find a way to get back to Oarg.” I'd like to see specificity – what kind of dangers? Italian chefs? Gum chewing teens? And more emotion around why they have to try to get along now that they are stuck on earth together. Good job, Erik!
Thanks for your comments for Erik, Lauri! And hope your Easter was happy and your cake delicious 🙂
Thanks for your comments for Erik, Julie, and I hope you're feeling much better! 🙂
Thanks so much for chiming in for Erik, Rachel – and sorry I somehow missed this until now!