Would You Read It Wednesday # 126 – Martin’s Perfect Web (PB) PLUS The February Pitch Pick

I am SO excited!

Only ONE MORE DAY! until the Match Madness Writing Contest opens!

I cannot wait to read the fabulous entries I hope will soon be pouring in to distract us from the fact that it is still 10 degrees even though tomorrow is the official first day of spring!

(The only small fly in the ointment is that I STILL don’t have an idea for my sample story…  EEK!  I am seriously running out of time!!!)

One quick note on the contest: apparently the definition of “fairy tale” is a knotty one, not, as I thought, clearly the Snow White, Cinderella, Little Red Riding Hood, Goldilocks, Sleeping Beauty, Ugly Duckling, Rapunzel, Rumplestiltskin etc. type of story.  So many people have argued their cases for nursery rhymes, fables, etc. and I don’t want to have to disqualify anyone over a difference in the definition of fairy tale, because different definitions do appear online, so whatever you guys have written is fine.  Apparently the rules were not clear enough, so my fellow judges and I will figure it out 🙂 But, I do hold the line on art notes.  Even if your story is intended to be a picture book, no art notes because we get into a weird area with word count.  And in answer to someone’s question, your title doesn’t count in the word count.

I think Something Chocolate might fuel the creative muse.  Let’s have some of Teresa’s French Chocolate Silk Pie, shall we?

Teresa’s French Chocolate Silk Pie – gorgeous, isn’t it?
And here’s a tasty view of a delicious slice – YUM!

Ah!  I feel more creative already! 🙂

But now let’s get down to brass tacks!

First, the February Pitch Pick.  Here are the contestants:

#1 Kristine
The STEM Girls Take Off – Picture Book (ages 5-8)
Sophia wants to win the school science fair, but when her project won’t cooperate, she uses perseverance and teamwork to bring home the goal, proving that every girl can be a STEM girl.

#2 Pam B
Fee Fi Fo Flub – Picture Book (ages 4-8)
The giant Mini wants to continue her school’s tradition of putting on the annual production of Klurg and the Beanstalk. But during practice, Mini’s co-star makes jokes and goes off-script, and Mini fears he will ruin the show. It is only when Mini makes her own blunder on opening night that she realizes the value of creativity and flexibility, and works with her co-star to make the show a success.

#3 Julie G
Diary Of A Linky Kid – Picture Book (ages 4-7)
Herman wishes he was like everyone else, but when all the other kids are gazing at their belly buttons during gym class, Herman is hiding his coil shaped tummy under his t-shirt. When just another day at school turns into a daring rescue mission, Herman becomes an unlikely hero when his flexibility saves the day.

#4 Steve
Silly Tilly – Picture Book (ages 4-8)
Tilly’s dreams of having a baby come true when a hatching egg presents her with a fluffy bundle of … crocodile! Everything is bliss until Charlie starts to grow. AND grow. When her friends start disappearing, Tilly worries that she’s next on the menu. But when Charlie invites her down to his cave, she’s in for a big surprise … party!

Please vote in the poll below by Friday March 21 at 11:59PM ET for the one you feel most deserves a read by editor Erin Molta.

Many thanks!!!

Today’s pitch comes to us from Beth H. who says she is a, “Chocaholic, reformed Catholic, (I don’t feel guilty anymore about eating chocolate), red wine lover – (no I was not an altar girl) seeking to publish children’s books that introduce children to self love, thinking out of the box and just plain silliness.”  

Here is her pitch:

Working Title: Martin’s Perfect Web
Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 5-7)
The Pitch: In a quest to build the perfect web, an obsessive compulsive spider confronts his biggest fears through an unlikely friendship with an inquisitive dragon. In a wild ride on the dragon’s tail, Martin learns how to relax and enjoy the simple process of creating – leaving a beautiful web behind him to his utter disbelief.  

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Beth improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)
Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in July so you’ve got a little time to polish up your pitches and send yours for your chance to be read by editor Erin Molta!

Beth is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!  I am looking forward to the contest!  The March Madness Writing Contest!!  Which starts tomorrow!!!  I’m so excited!!!!  Oh, wait.  I’m having deja vu.  Did I already say that???  Never mind.  It’s still true.  Start counting the hours!!!

(And won’t I feel silly if my sample – which promises to be quite dreadful since I don’t even have an idea yet, and therefore have yet to write a single word with less than 12 hours before I have to post it –  is the only entry!  So please, save me from myself and enter! :))

See you tomorrow even though it’s Thursday…

Have a wonderful Wednesday, everyone! 🙂

84 thoughts on “Would You Read It Wednesday # 126 – Martin’s Perfect Web (PB) PLUS The February Pitch Pick

  1. deborahhwilliams says:

    Yes, I would read it! I like the idea of dealing with OCDC behavior in a light-hearted way. Sounds like a niche that needs filling. Plus, I love the huge difference in size between a spider and a dragon.

  2. Beth Halleran says:

    HI Patric – you are right – it is a romping story about letting go! Yay – I'm glad that came across. Will make the changes to the OCD – thanks…

  3. Steve Moran says:

    Hi Beth. Lovely idea. I agree with the OCD comments below and feel strongly about cutting “to his utter disbelief.” If you did cut it, then the pitch would end with a positive statement rather than a (slightly) negative one. Good luck with it.

  4. Julie Grasso says:

    Yes I would read it. You have some great comments already, so I won't add. Love that he takes a ride on a dragons tail.

  5. Genevieve says:

    I love a spider-meets-dragon story with a happy ending, so yes. I would read it. I agree with the suggested “fussy” or “perfectionist” in place of OCD. Good luck with it.

  6. Takara Beech says:

    My mind paused when the tail was identified as how he romped, it narrowed my many ideas from romp, swing, dangle and slip from the dragon's claws, jaws and wings to just the tail. I also paused on 'utter disbelief'. I didn't have a problem with using obsessive compulsive, the two words summed up a really cool and interesting character who experiences a lot of trouble along the way.

    e.g. In a quest to build the perfect web, an obsessive compulsive spider confronts his biggest fears through an unlikely friendship with an inquisitive dragon. In a wild ride on 'dragon, Martin learns to let go and create his most perfect web yet'.

  7. Kristine P says:

    Since I am your critique partner, I'm 4000% biased, but of course I'd read it! You have such a wonderful imagination Beth, and it is always so much fun to see the completely original stories you create!

  8. Vivian Kirkfield says:

    Four great pitches to pick from…difficult, but I did vote.:)
    And thanks for the yummy chocolate, Susanna…I need it after writing my Fractured Fairy Tale…and I know you will come up with something super…you always do.:) I'm so excited to post tomorrow and link up with you!
    I would definitely read Beth's story…I think OCD is a topic that needs more books geared to kids…I didn't have a problem with using OCD, but I do understand the point that using a word like perfectionist might help the book appeal to kids (and parents) who are not diagnosed, but have issues with this.
    Love the ride on the dragon…and agree that it is not necessary to say dragon's tail…and I love the suggestion to leave off the utter disbelief. Sorry I don't have any further pitch fixes…but Beth, you did such a good job with it already, there isn't much to fix. 🙂

  9. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Thanks so much for your helpful comments for Beth, Stacy, and for voting. As for my tale… we shall see what happens… you will all be subjected to it in short order since I've only got about 4 hours left to get it done 🙂

  10. Susanna Leonard Hill says:

    Thanks for voting, and for your thoughts for Beth, Joanna! And yes, sigh, I thought it was clear, but the number of emails I've gotten suggests otherwise 🙂 No matter, we will hopefully all have tons of fun anyway 🙂

  11. Julie Rowan-Zoch says:

    I picked a pitch I presume is perfect! lol

    I would read Beth's, but it's a bit big-wordy. I find myself focussed too much to the bigger words and less on the storyline. Yeah, I'm weird like that! maybe substitute a word or two to keep my head in the game. Of course, I am probably the only one who noticed them!

  12. Rosi says:

    Chocolate silk pie — yummmmm. Thanks! I would probably read the book. I find the OCD connection a compelling one, although I have a little trouble picturing a friendship between a dragon and a spider, but that's a problem on my end. I also think losing the “utter disbelief” would be an improvement.

  13. Beth Halleran says:

    HI Julie – I actually changed the pitch markedly 1 week after submitting. I realized that it did not really go into the storyline. So – yeah – I got you! 🙂

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